Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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