This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Randomize
