On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
