Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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