Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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