Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
My bed smells like the plague
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
