Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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