Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
he puts the penis in happiness.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
we're so committed to being not committed
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
