when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Randomize