she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
