Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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