So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
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Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
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I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
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