New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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