i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
