he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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