I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
