Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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