You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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