he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Randomize
