then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
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Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
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