lets start a swedish sibling band together
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize