oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Randomize
