i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
