We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
