You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
