would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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