as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Randomize
