Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us