How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.