My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
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I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
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It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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