Its about making memories worth repressing
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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