i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
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