It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
