Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
