I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
...so i touched it.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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