ugly people sure do ruin things
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
