we're blogging at a bar
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
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