why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
