that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
