is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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