on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
