Screwed.edu
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
