Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize
