i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
this is an emotional support booty call
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
