Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
