remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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