Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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