I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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