I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
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