He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
