Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
my poor anus
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
