I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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